Colossian Blog

Displaying all posts tagged "Sexuality".
Second Colossian Way Cohort Kicks Off
September 27, 2017 | Jennifer Vander Molen
Second Colossian Way Cohort Kicks Off
Last week, we hosted 22 leaders, 7 coaches, and 4 observers at our second Colossian Way leader training. This was the first training held in our Grand Rapids office, and we enjoyed hosting these leaders from across the country as they were trained to lead the Colossian Way experience in their local churches and schools. The cohort delved into the mission and vision of The Colossian Forum, unpacked what it means to tackle conflict as an opportunity for deeper discipleship, and got hands-on tips and experience leading a small group. This cohort will lead their local small groups through both the sexuality and origins experience. Leaders came to this training from Alaska, California, Colorado, Tennessee, and Michigan. Please join us in praying for these brothers and sisters in Christ as they gather their small groups to run The Colossian Way in early 2018. We look forward to hearing and sharing more about their journey through The Colossian Way! How you can get involved If you're interested in leading a Colossian Way small group in your church or school, please visit our Colossian Way page to find out more information about upcoming cohorts, training, and details. Our next leader training is in May 2018. We hope to see you there! Scenes from Colossian Way leader training [gallery size="medium" ids="8340,8350,8341,8342,8343,8344,8354,8346,8347,8348,8349,8352"]
From Conflict to Unity and a New Way Forward
August 16, 2017 | Jennifer Vander Molen
From Conflict to Unity and a New Way Forward
We're honored that Pillar Church asked TCF president Michael Gulker to present on Conflict as Opportunity: Learning to Fight Like Jesus, as part of their Christ in the City series in Holland, Michigan. Christ in the City is focusing on how Christians can make peace with duality in the world. Topics covered include creation, gender, politics, the church body, and human sexuality. Pillar was the site of a denominational split in the 1850s. Like many tough conflicts, tensions were high, both sides entrenched in the truth as they believed it, and answers simply pointed to the growing divide. It came to a head when some members of Pillar Church locked other members out, went on to start a new church, which soon led to a new denomination. It's a familiar story of conflict and separation, even over 150 years later. Pillar's history is defined by division and conflict, and today they are the first church that is dually affiliated with the denominations involved in the split.  It's not an easy path, but a remarkable one that truly shows that "all things hold together in Christ" (Colossians 1:17). In our watchful, divided, and polarized world, we're thrilled to be partners with churches like Pillar who engage in deep discipleship and are proof of what it looks like when you turn conflict into opportunity. Here's the audio of Michael Gulker's presentation on learning to fight like Jesus. [audio mp3="http://colossianforum.org/site.2016/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/Pillar_20170809_CITC.mp3"][/audio] Curious how we're helping make a more beautiful church? Our mission here at The Colossian Forum is to equip leaders to transform cultural conflicts into opportunities for spiritual growth and witness. We want to see a more beautiful church, one that acts Christian, especially in the face of conflict. Check out our series of three short videos that introduces The Colossian Way. The first covers wicked problems. [embed]https://vimeo.com/180640688[/embed] The second tackles Christian virtues: [embed]https://vimeo.com/187857994[/embed] And the third outlines how we see conflict as opportunity here at TCF. [embed]https://vimeo.com/180188904[/embed] We have a short video discussion guide that accompanies this video series. To access it, email us at info@colossianforum.org. Simply mention videos in the subject line. When you email us, we'll also send you our Top Ten Frequently Asked Questions to help guide your discipleship journey. One Last Thing The Colossian Forum shot a video at Pillar Church a few years ago that highlights our foundation in faith, science, and culture, and how that important conversation is a stepping stone to deeper discipleship and Christian witness. Enjoy! [embed]https://vimeo.com/32912914[/embed]
The Unpredictable Practice of Showing Up
May 31, 2017 | Jennifer Vander Molen
The Unpredictable Practice of Showing Up
Today we welcome Jeremy Bork to The Colossian Blog. Jeremy is a 2017 graduate of Western Theological Seminary in Holland, Michigan. Living into his call to youth ministry and love of creation, he will serve this summer as the Assistant Chaplain at Camp Fowler, an RCA wilderness camp in the Adirondack Mountains in upstate New York. He recently accepted a call to Westminster Presbyterian Church in Grand Rapids, and will transition into that role in the fall. He participated in a Colossian Way pilot group earlier this year. Last spring I was asked to participate in a small group at Fellowship Reformed Church to test out and offer feedback for a curriculum that sought to engage church conflict around human sexuality. Without much consideration of what they were asking and what I’d be getting into, I said yes. I would later learn that small yes was a greater yes to The Colossian Way, and that yes would come with a cost. For the next ten weeks I gathered every Thursday with members of Fellowship to listen, wrestle, pray, play, apologize, testify, and give thanks. Resisting the world’s seduction toward division, we showed up, sat around one table, read the same sacred texts, prayed to the One we all follow, told our stories, and shared our visions for the future and present of the church. We chose community over tribe, hospitality over hostility, empathy over judgment, and compassion over fear. The Colossian Way insists that participants speak their truth in love. Both words matter. First, truth: say what you need to say. Don’t water it down to get everyone in the room to agree with you. At best that leads to a superficial, integrity-lacking illusion of unity. Instead speak fully and boldly the truth you need to say. Second, love: speak kindly and compassionately. Never say something to intentionally hurt another person. Be aware of the effects your words might have on another, and be ready to receive how someone else experiences your truth. During these ten weeks, we tried our best to speak our truths in love, but too often our gentle, West-Michigan-nice fronts walled us from faithfully speaking our convictions. During our last meeting, Brian broke the barrier. He turned to me and shared about how badly he wants to love me but how his traditional convictions about biblical texts that address same-sex behavior haven’t changed. He genuinely wanted to know how his beliefs affected me and what he could tangibly do to make me feel loved. I thanked him for his honesty and responded transparently. I shared about my sincere thankfulness for our friendship and that he loves me best when he listens to my story to understand and not to respond. I also shared that while I would perhaps worship at Fellowship sometime, I would never bring my boyfriend. Our vulnerability opened others in the room to share what they had wanted to for nine weeks. It was sloppy and beautiful. Let’s Talk LGBTQ With current denominational and institutional divisions around beliefs about LGBTQ people, the student counsel at Western Theological Seminary (my very recent alma mater) felt like this was a needed topic to address. Considering I had been at Western for three years without a single public conversation about something that affected me so directly, I felt like this was long overdue. Together we pitched a community conversation to the seminary leadership. Once the event was approved, it only made sense that it would be facilitated by representatives from The Colossian Way, considering they are what we hope to be: a community that creates space for people to willingly, bravely, and hopefully enter into conflict trusting that Christ holds all things together. Their vision is honorable but uncommon: Christian communities that behave like Christ. On Tuesday, April 25, the Student Counsel of Western Theological Seminary hosted a community conversation titled Staying in the Dialogue in the Midst of Difference: Let’s Talk LGBTQ. As a result of student counsel’s organization, Stacey Duensing’s tenacity, and my pestering, the seminary took an important first step: breaking the silence. I was a panelist for the discussion, along with Brian, the pastor of Fellowship and fellow participant of the TCW group the year before. While on the panel, Brian asked if I felt like “The Token Gay” during last year’s pilot. I grinned and spoke my truth: “Absolutely! But it didn’t bother me, because I knew going in that that’s what I would be. It was important enough to me that an actual LGBTQ person was part of the pilot that I was willing to be that person. It also didn’t bother me, because it was only for 90 minutes a week. At the end of our meeting, I could walk away. That has not been true during my three years at Western. I don’t get to walk away. I am the token gay always. As much as I wear my pain-avoidant smile, being me here is exhausting. I hadn’t realized just how depleting seminary has been for me, and I don’t think I’ve completed grasped how long it will take to heal, to be restored, to return to being just Jeremy.” For a moment I was heard, I was seen, I was known. Unlike the countless walks through the halls wondering who affirms my presence and who wishes I wasn’t around, I sat grateful for the chance to name what is true and hopeful that in opening myself others might do likewise. The conversation continued. Rob asked more questions. Brian and I stayed in the dialogue. We listened curiously, shared truthfully, and questioned genuinely. Our words were unscripted yet deeply formed by our love of God our love for one another. Some who attended the community conversation were upset that Brian and I hugged after we shared such blatantly opposing beliefs on the panel. Noticing the power difference between the two of us, they were uncomfortable that our gesture implied all LGBTQ people should be reconciled to their non-affirming elders to the point of physical embrace. While I understand where they are coming from, Brian and I didn’t fabricate a friendship on April 25. We are actually, authentically friends. We drink coffee and talk about church leadership. When we run into each other at the gym, we sacrifice a squat to catch up with one another. We hugged after the panel, because we have a past, we will have a future, and we are grateful for one other in the present, despite all the ways our friendship is complex. I believe in The Colossian Way, because I believe in the way of Jesus. The ideas of The Colossian Way are not new, but they are radical. It is the simple and unpredictable practice of showing up. It is a foretaste – not a glimpse but a first taste – of the life to come where there’s enough, where everyone belongs, where all of life is connected. It’s an invitation to a way of peace, unity, and empathy rooted in the disciplines of Jesus, and saying yes to this lifestyle will come at a cost. For me, it has required bravery, vulnerability, fierce truth telling, and active listening. At times it has been tiring, irritating, and lonely. But it has been worth it. I have felt the Spirit move in surprising ways. I have seen God’s image revealed in unexpected people. I have heard a fuller telling of the good news of God’s love. I have tasted and seen that Christ truly does hold all things together.
Everything We Need
April 5, 2017 | Michael Gulker
Everything We Need
Dear Friends, As Christians, we take it on faith that God has already given us everything we need to be faithful. Yet, we can’t help but wonder how this plays out as our churches shrink and age, our public influence declines, and we are every bit as divided as the surrounding culture—or more so. What does “everything we need” look like when tensions are high, when you feel strongly about a particular topic and are absolutely certain “they” have it completely wrong? Especially when that “they” includes friends, a spouse, children, or parents? In this world, we don’t always get what we want. Neither did Jesus: “Take this cup from me.” But we do get what we need: “Thy will be done.” And what we need to heal our fractured communities and lives is what we already have in abundance—opportunities to lay down our lives for those with whom we disagree as the means by which we learn to trust that the goodness of the Father is enough. Recently, I had the privilege of experiencing this “everything we need” up close through The Colossian Way. We thought we had gathered to talk about sexuality and marriage, but what we discovered was deep and abiding loneliness: loneliness of a sexual minority, loneliness of someone long widowed, loneliness of a divorcee, loneliness of a happily married man, loneliness of a woman who feared rejection if people knew what she “really” thought. We all had different thoughts about marriage, yet we shared a longing for communion and fellowship that won’t be fulfilled this side of heaven. In fact, we found that much of our disagreements about marriage were driven by our fears of loneliness. But in sharing that loneliness we found a fellowship with God and one another that was enough, a foretaste, a brief transfiguration of our lives giving us a glimpse of what will be. Perhaps more challengingly, God also revealed that he isn’t going to resolve our disagreements for us. Rather, by giving us these irresolvable dilemmas, he’s revealed our idolatrous fixation on what we want: certainty, resolution, security—all without having to lay down our lives. But we don’t get what we want. What we get is the call to participate in Christ’s own sacrificial love so that we and the world may know that he is Lord. Friends, it’s my prayer that this story will remind you of what you already know: the reconciling power of the gospel is everything we need. When we encounter the true and living God in these vulnerable spaces, when we have our lives transfigured by loving as Christ loves, this is when we realize afresh the secret of contentment: the gospel is TRUE! We rediscover in those moments that what we need has been there in front of us all along—the broken body of Christ, given for us. Thanks be to God! This post is excerpted from our April prayer letter. To receive the prayer letter in your inbox, click on the button below. Subscribe! To the monthly prayer letter.
Applications Now Being Accepted for The Colossian Way Experience
March 1, 2017 | Jennifer Vander Molen
Applications Now Being Accepted for The Colossian Way Experience
We’re excited to announce that applications are now being accepted for small groups to engage in The Colossian Way experience. We designed The Colossian Way to help Christians of all ages engage in difficult questions in ways that build up love of God and neighbor. By gathering Christians who disagree, confessing that all things hold together in Christ (Colossians 1:17), bringing our difficulties before God in prayer, listening to varied experts on the topics, attending to Scripture and the resources of the faith, and learning to listen and talk across difference, we can trust the Holy Spirit to transform us into the image of Christ. Training Dates The first step in The Colossian Way experience is a 2½-day leader training retreat, held in Grand Rapids, MI on these dates: Thursday-Saturday, May 18-20, 2017 (sexuality topic only) or Wednesday-Friday, September 20-22, 2017 (sexuality and origins topic) Commitments Churches and leaders who participate in The Colossian Way commit to: Attend the leader training retreat Meet with coaches and other small group leaders during the experience Gather an intergenerational group of 10-12 participants for the small group experience Lead the small group through ten 90-minute meetings over a set schedule Cost Cost for The Colossian Way experience is $1,500 per small group, which includes the leader training retreat (hotel accommodations, meals, and training materials for two leaders), materials (leader and participant guides for the entire small group), The Colossian Way promotional pieces for your church, personal coaching for leaders, and membership in The Colossian Way Community of Practice. How to Apply You can find an online application and more information about The Colossian Way experience here. Be on the lookout for 2018 training retreat dates posted soon on our events page. We can’t wait for you to join us on The Colossian Way!
Summer 2015 Newsletter
September 15, 2015 | Jeanna Boase
Summer 2015 Newsletter
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